some nights

post to be accompanied by this recording:


and some nights alone in your apartment,
you begin to draw.
and you use black pen on white paper.
or sometimes pencil.
and when you draw lines, you watch them appear.
Flowing out of the tip of your black ballpoint pen.
and the lines make you happy.
because they are smooth, and you have control, and the contrast is high.
and you can go for hours without looking up.
and this is the only thing you've ever done which engages you in this way.
and you are alone, and the lights are turned up,
so they illuminate the room.
and the window curtains are drawn wide open.
and you are in front of the window.
and it's a saturday night.
and you could be doing so many other different things.
But you watch the black lines flow.
and the lines make you happy.
so you dont feel the need to do anything else.

and you can either go slow or fast. or somewhere in the middle.
or sometimes you close your eyes and scribble.
and you can feel the lines through the vibrations of the pen in your hands
and you can see them all around your head.
and you know they are there.
blazing on the clean white sheet of large paper.

and your see other things besides the lines.
people's faces.
strangers and friends, lovers and family. conveying attitudes.
warm smiles, and looks of foxy distrust.
and words come, as if said by these faces.
or from your own lips.
And the words are fragmented, and conveying senseless connective meanings.
Describing acts, or abstract scenery.
and you get focused in on one sound, or a wave of light piercing your eyelids.
which are still pulled down.
and you could have been imagining for minutes. or it could have been a blink,
but the lines are still flowing.
and you are still holding the pen.

And when you are ready, you can pick up a new tool.
and make color.
you have blue and red,
and light turquoise-blue and orange.
and you might make new overlapping lines.
or you may fill in spaces between the black.
and you thought you liked to use black,
and you did, but now you are making color.
and the layers start to come out.
and as time passes,
you are content and warm.

then at some point, your phone might ring,
or you might put on a music recording.
or you might get hungry, and make spinach,
or rice.
and your night might end. because it is late.
and you know if you go to sleep, you can wake up in the morning when the sun is out.
and you can go for a ride into town.
or take a train to the coast.
and you smile at the possibility,
and this human experience is good.


you can download the recording by right-clicking here and saving the linked file.